'88 Coupe GT 1.8 - Page 2

Emjay · 26-05-09, 01:50 PM

an apparently true Dear Deirdre letter

Dear Deirdre

I have been engaged for almost a year. I am to be married next month. My fiancée's mother is not only very attractive but really great and understanding. She is putting the entire wedding together and invited me to her place to go over the invitation list because it had grown a bit beyond what we had expected it to be. When I got to her place we reviewed the list and trimmed it down to just under a hundred ... then she floored me. She said that in a month I would be a married man and that before that happened, she wanted to have sex with me. Then she just stood up and walked to her bedroom and on her way said that I knew where the front door was if I wanted to leave. I stood there for about five minutes and finally decided that I knew exactly how to deal with this situation.

I headed straight out the front door... There, leaning against my car was her husband, my father-in-law to be. He was smiling. He explained that they just wanted to be sure I was a good kid and would be true to their little girl. I shook his hand and he congratulated me on passing their little test.

Should I tell my fiancée' what her parents did, and that I thought their "little test" was asinine and insulting to my character?
Or.....should I keep the whole thing to myself including the fact that the reason I was walking out to my car was to get a condom?

Martc · 26-05-09, 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Isimmo

Mart, I keep wondering this, Is it hot living in toaster? And do you find crumbs everywhere?

Its very hot living in toaster, so hot your could get burnt if you are not in control and you don't know what you are doing, especially as there is lots of delicious crumpet on offer round here

I have even heard stories of all sorts of things being spread all over them, jam, chocolate spread, gentlemans relish.....

And a quattro is a must have to drive round these parts after the rain as all those crumbs make for terrible road conditioons - bit like slush after snow.....

PS - I generally tend to find you get crumbs in the bed after a good session!

SteveT63 · 26-05-09, 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Martc

Its very hot living in toaster, so hot your could get burnt if you are not in control and you don't know what you are doing, especially as there is lots of delicious crumpet on offer round here

I have even heard stories of all sorts of things being spread all over them, jam, chocolate spread, gentlemans relish.....

And a quattro is a must have to drive round these parts after the rain as all those crumbs make for terrible road conditioons - bit like slush after snow.....

PS - I generally tend to find you get crumbs in the bed after a good session!

If you put your biscuits in a Jaffa Cake tube first, the crumbs will stay in the tube andjust stick to the bottom!!

Martc · 26-05-09, 03:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SteveT63

If you put your biscuits in a Jaffa Cake tube first, the crumbs will stay in the tube andjust stick to the bottom!!

Thanks Steve - I assume by using a jaffa cake tin it will mean my crumbs would be seedless?

Emjay · 26-05-09, 05:55 PM

no...thats a satsuma cake, jaffa's are full of seed

Martc · 26-05-09, 06:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Emjay

no...thats a satsuma cake, jaffa's are full of seed

Damn perhaps I am using the wrong brand.......

We have towcester tea cakes, perhaps I'll try those and see what happens....

SteveCat · 26-05-09, 07:10 PM

Mr Tolly from Sidcup adds (in Cyril "Bosseye" Fletcher voice)

A smashing vehicle.....ideal for pulling my trailer tent!

Emjay · 26-05-09, 07:14 PM

"Pin back ya lugholes"

Isimmo · 26-05-09, 07:59 PM

I do believe, Martin, you've killed this thread....

Martc · 26-05-09, 11:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Isimmo

I do believe, Martin, you've killed this thread....

Which one - moi or mr Mj?

26-05-09, 07:10 PM	#17
SteveCat 4 ring whore! Classic Audi Club Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 3,523	. Mr Tolly from Sidcup adds (in Cyril "Bosseye" Fletcher voice) A smashing vehicle.....ideal for pulling my trailer tent! __________________ Mercedes E220 Sportline Coupe

26-05-09, 07:59 PM	#19
Isimmo Super Moderator Classic Audi Club Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Sissix-by-the-sea Posts: 15,218	I do believe, Martin, you've killed this thread.... __________________ 1985 WR quattro, 1985 20vT RallyRep, 1993 MTM ABY S2 Avant. 2010 S3 Sportback.

26-05-09, 01:50 PM	#11
Emjay Man Fettler Extraodinaire Classic Audi Club Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Up my own arse blowing smoke Posts: 7,417	an apparently true Dear Deirdre letter Dear Deirdre I have been engaged for almost a year. I am to be married next month. My fiancée's mother is not only very attractive but really great and understanding. She is putting the entire wedding together and invited me to her place to go over the invitation list because it had grown a bit beyond what we had expected it to be. When I got to her place we reviewed the list and trimmed it down to just under a hundred ... then she floored me. She said that in a month I would be a married man and that before that happened, she wanted to have sex with me. Then she just stood up and walked to her bedroom and on her way said that I knew where the front door was if I wanted to leave. I stood there for about five minutes and finally decided that I knew exactly how to deal with this situation. I headed straight out the front door... There, leaning against my car was her husband, my father-in-law to be. He was smiling. He explained that they just wanted to be sure I was a good kid and would be true to their little girl. I shook his hand and he congratulated me on passing their little test. Should I tell my fiancée' what her parents did, and that I thought their "little test" was asinine and insulting to my character? Or.....should I keep the whole thing to myself including the fact that the reason I was walking out to my car was to get a condom?

26-05-09, 05:55 PM	#15
Emjay Man Fettler Extraodinaire Classic Audi Club Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Up my own arse blowing smoke Posts: 7,417	no...thats a satsuma cake, jaffa's are full of seed

26-05-09, 07:14 PM	#18
Emjay Man Fettler Extraodinaire Classic Audi Club Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Up my own arse blowing smoke Posts: 7,417	"Pin back ya lugholes"