Whats Your Biggest Car Balls Up??!!

SteveT63 · 23-08-09, 03:04 PM

I stood at the pumps on Friday and whilst doing lip sync to a Go West song on me Cambridge Cassette, remembering fondly, my attempts to actually become Peter Cox and chat up an Irish Beauty on the 85 Manx while trying to impress her with my moves to that very song,,,,, I poisioned the 90 with tractor fuel....

...."Call Me"..."Do Do Do Do Do Do" ...............A Tw*t!

john johnson · 23-08-09, 03:20 PM

Your mind was elsewhere alright.... Buried between... Well anyhow!

quattrokid · 23-08-09, 03:36 PM

I decided to put white led bulbs in the RS4's sidelights,so armed myself with the necessary tools and proceeded to remove the drive side first,managed that side ok.... ok now the pasenger side,I couldnt release the headlight unit so I took off the cap for the ABS unit ( I think its the ABS unit oil cap so I could remove the ABS plastic cover so I could get to the rear nut holding the headlight in, while wriggling the light free I knocked the oil cap off and it went down the side if the engine block and came to rest under the radiator and the air con couling, I couldnt now see where it went so I foiund a piece of wire in the garage and scrapped it along the bottom eventually moved the cap but couldnt get to it.

Bollocks so I changed the bulbs whileit was out,then I had no option but to callout the Greenflag service to raise the front of the car up to gain entry fron underneath to the cooling fan housing.

When the chap arrived he laughed then he decided to jack up the passenger side of the car, removed the under tray then realised he couldnt get there either without having to remove the under tray, intercooler piping and ancillary stuff there as well... eventually after afew minutes of gymnastic maneuvers and cursing from this guy, he finally pulled his hand out holding the cap

He then put everything back as it should be underneath then took my hand and placed the cap in it and called me a wanker

He kept me company while I refitted the headlight unit and checked it worked then departed.

Coxy · 23-08-09, 03:38 PM

buying a Lada!

john johnson · 23-08-09, 03:47 PM

Only cos you got a bollocking from her Indoors ya norbert! Cool car matey

Micky · 23-08-09, 03:52 PM

Buying a escort mk1 with more holes than a colander all the four floor pans had gone
Rust under the rear seat .then swopd it for a rover p6 that had no rear brakes

the Joys of motoring

ZermattGT · 23-08-09, 04:02 PM

Back in the mid 90's I owned a fairly nice, but needy Fjord Blue 1976 BMW 3.0si (Bavaria) with red leather interior. Mods included an AC Snitzer cam, Alpina 70% posi rear end and Alpina style wheels.

The street it was parked on flooded with nearly 18" of water. Thinking that with the rain still coming it would only get worse, I went over to it and climbed in (car was tilted to one side) and started here up, only to create a massive series of electrical shorts. Should have left her alone. The rain abated, but the car never ran right after that. I chased electrical demons and resourced NLA relays for a year before I gave up on her.

Hell of a road car. RIP

Save Ferris · 31-08-09, 12:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Micky

Buying a escort mk1 with more holes than a colander all the four floor pans had gone
Rust under the rear seat .

Mine is a similar story, I bought a Mk2 Escort just before I left school, looked OK , thought I was Mr Cool being 16 and having a car.

Until the day I decided to jack it up, and the jack went straight through the sills

although I can laugh about it now!
I think I paid £400 for it back in '91. I remember thin bin men offering £40 for it and me saying NO, but my Dad sold it to them - then gave me £360 out of his pocket.

Never owned a Ford since.

yeti · 02-01-10, 07:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Coxy

buying a Lada!

Yeah, made that mistake. Then I later bought a Citroen.

Driving a Transit van on a sheet of ice, not realising I was on a sheet of ice. Then when I realised I was on a sheet of ice, eased off the go pedel. That was all well and good, but I forgot my van's got a stupid amount of torque so it kept doing about 40 while I did some epic fishtailing, got it up on 2 wheels and spun it round into a ditch.

Lending a "mate" my beautiful, spotless black Volvo 960 Exec. Never saw that one again.

Dropping the bonnet on my Camry without moving a spanner off the wing top. Damn near had tears over that one.

Springyboy · 02-01-10, 01:13 PM

Not a disaster story but you may find it amusing.
Many years ago I had an HB Viva. It was before the days of steering locks, it just had an ignition key that fitted into a lock on the dashboard. The lock and key were very worn and you could pull the key out without turning the lock, thus you could remove the key while leaving the engine running.
One morning I started the car then remembered I had left something indoors. Because my house key was on the same keyring as the car key I simply removed the entire ring from the car inorder to open the front door. I collected the item I had forgotten then drove 25 miles to work. It was only when I arrived and went to switch off the engine that I realised my keys were still at home indoors.
I stopped the engine by stalling it, then borrowed another old style key from a colleague to open the boot and use my tool kit to hot wire the car to get me home again that evening. Much leg-pulling in the office that day. It could never happen now with our sophisticated cars, but there's a lot to be said for the simple old cars we used to run.

23-08-09, 03:20 PM	#2
john johnson Moderator of sausages Classic Audi Club Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: sheffield Posts: 13,331	Your mind was elsewhere alright.... Buried between... Well anyhow! __________________ Mr OCD http://s159.photobucket.com/albums/t144/jsquatts/ Daily rs4 b7 with buckets that play havoc with my piles And if you are reading this as James may would say ' you're a cock '

23-08-09, 03:36 PM	#3
quattrokid 4 ring whore! Classic Audi Club Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Ayrshire Posts: 9,654	I decided to put white led bulbs in the RS4's sidelights,so armed myself with the necessary tools and proceeded to remove the drive side first,managed that side ok.... ok now the pasenger side,I couldnt release the headlight unit so I took off the cap for the ABS unit ( I think its the ABS unit oil cap so I could remove the ABS plastic cover so I could get to the rear nut holding the headlight in, while wriggling the light free I knocked the oil cap off and it went down the side if the engine block and came to rest under the radiator and the air con couling, I couldnt now see where it went so I foiund a piece of wire in the garage and scrapped it along the bottom eventually moved the cap but couldnt get to it. Bollocks so I changed the bulbs whileit was out,then I had no option but to callout the Greenflag service to raise the front of the car up to gain entry fron underneath to the cooling fan housing. When the chap arrived he laughed then he decided to jack up the passenger side of the car, removed the under tray then realised he couldnt get there either without having to remove the under tray, intercooler piping and ancillary stuff there as well... eventually after afew minutes of gymnastic maneuvers and cursing from this guy, he finally pulled his hand out holding the cap He then put everything back as it should be underneath then took my hand and placed the cap in it and called me a wanker He kept me company while I refitted the headlight unit and checked it worked then departed. __________________ RS4 B5 (wife's / ours now ) S3 8L Imola Yellow S3 8L Nogaro blue UrWR SOLD UrS4 saloon (SOLD again) S4 Cabrio (SOLD) A4 cabrio 2.5 V6tdi (SOLD) 80 cabrio 2.6 V6 SOLD 90 quattro 10v SOLD 100 2.2e SOLD FOUNDING MEMBER the 200,000 Plus miles Club

23-08-09, 03:47 PM	#5
john johnson Moderator of sausages Classic Audi Club Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: sheffield Posts: 13,331	Only cos you got a bollocking from her Indoors ya norbert! Cool car matey __________________ Mr OCD http://s159.photobucket.com/albums/t144/jsquatts/ Daily rs4 b7 with buckets that play havoc with my piles And if you are reading this as James may would say ' you're a cock '

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23-08-09, 03:38 PM	#4
Coxy 4 Ring Mafia Classic Audi Club Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: on the side of a hill in Shropshire! Posts: 28,215	buying a Lada!

23-08-09, 03:52 PM	#6
Micky Mr Fifty Thousand! Classic Audi Club Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Birmingham Posts: 8,738	Buying a escort mk1 with more holes than a colander all the four floor pans had gone Rust under the rear seat .then swopd it for a rover p6 that had no rear brakes the Joys of motoring

23-08-09, 04:02 PM	#7
ZermattGT Quad Lamp Commando Classic Audi Club Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Massachusetts, U.S.A. Posts: 4,299	Back in the mid 90's I owned a fairly nice, but needy Fjord Blue 1976 BMW 3.0si (Bavaria) with red leather interior. Mods included an AC Snitzer cam, Alpina 70% posi rear end and Alpina style wheels. The street it was parked on flooded with nearly 18" of water. Thinking that with the rain still coming it would only get worse, I went over to it and climbed in (car was tilted to one side) and started here up, only to create a massive series of electrical shorts. Should have left her alone. The rain abated, but the car never ran right after that. I chased electrical demons and resourced NLA relays for a year before I gave up on her. Hell of a road car. RIP

02-01-10, 01:13 PM	#10
Springyboy Newbie! Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Kent Posts: 11	Not a disaster story but you may find it amusing. Many years ago I had an HB Viva. It was before the days of steering locks, it just had an ignition key that fitted into a lock on the dashboard. The lock and key were very worn and you could pull the key out without turning the lock, thus you could remove the key while leaving the engine running. One morning I started the car then remembered I had left something indoors. Because my house key was on the same keyring as the car key I simply removed the entire ring from the car inorder to open the front door. I collected the item I had forgotten then drove 25 miles to work. It was only when I arrived and went to switch off the engine that I realised my keys were still at home indoors. I stopped the engine by stalling it, then borrowed another old style key from a colleague to open the boot and use my tool kit to hot wire the car to get me home again that evening. Much leg-pulling in the office that day. It could never happen now with our sophisticated cars, but there's a lot to be said for the simple old cars we used to run.